Gay Truth

GetUp! Action for Australia releases "Love Story"

2011-11-25T15:03:00.000-08:00

GetUp is an Australian independent community advocacy organisation giving people the opportunity to get involved and hold politicians accountable on important issues. Many of their videos are in an educational form, often promoting a scientific and reasoned view. Recently they launched a climate change campaign after a rather significant public backlash against the taxing of carbon.

Their latest focuses is marriage equality, on the eve of a conscience vote on the issue at the ALP National Conference. This is where the current governing Labor Party will decide on their stance to ending marriage discrimination.

GetUp's basic message: "We've removed discrimination from our hearts -- now it's time to remove it from our laws."

Cory Monteith is Straight But Not Narrow

2011-07-04T05:12:00.000-07:00

Straight But Not Narrow (WeAreSBNN) is a campaign working to positively impact the way teens view and treat their LGBT peers.

Glee's Cory Monteith is SBNN:

Apple Says: It Gets Better Too

2011-04-14T21:59:00.001-07:00

Google Says: It Gets Better... and Better.

2010-10-24T01:24:00.000-07:00

The President of the USA Doesn't Care

2010-10-21T22:38:00.000-07:00

Myth:

The president of the USA doesn't care about LGBT people.

Truth:

He does. He also believes it gets better:

It Doesn't Get Better

2010-10-17T10:08:00.000-07:00

Myth:

It doesn't get better

Truth:

It sure does:

[seen at 2sides2ron]

Gay marriage is threatening because…

2010-08-02T23:27:00.000-07:00

We came across this article by John Barich from the Australian Family Association and decided to post our reply here as an example of the utter myth nonsense we face on a daily basis regarding marriage equality:

"stable marriages make to the wellbeing of children and society"

Which is why allowing homosexuals to marry will only reinforce it.

"..couples who had children before marriage, either from a previous relationship or the same relationship, were twice as likely to end up separated than couples without children born before marriage."

Gay couples never "accidentally" have children. They're always wanted and loved. Research shows that children of gay couples are just as (if not more) adjusted to society.

"marriage is good for you, good for children and good for society"

Although not exclusively. You don't want to marginalise couples who choose not to have children. Their marriages are just as valid.

"..it would be absurd to say that equality means men have the right to be mothers"

What utter nonsense reasoning. Mothers are mothers. Fathers are fathers. Tables are tables. Marriage equality won't change that.

"From society’s point of view, the chief purpose of the lifelong marriage relationship is to create the best possible environment to progenerate and raise children."

Not from the law's point of view (and not all of society). Children can be happily reared by couples who choose not to get married.

"Outside of that function, it doesn’t really make sense for two people to publicly promise to stay together for life"

I suggest you speak to the millions of childless married couples out there who will be happy to slap you with a wet fish based on your short sighted declaration.

"Progenerating children always requires a male and a female.. a deep yearning to know their genetic identity."

Why is this an argument to disallow adoption or the subject at hand: marriage equality?

"Marriage is the first step in the establishment of the genetic bond of family."

No, copulation is.. and it doesn't always result in a "family". Neither does marriage.

"..governments have no business interfering in personal relationships.."

Especially if they're religiously biased and discriminate ignorantly against a minority.. or when they support bigoted views like yours.

"..marriage, as a lifelong commitment between a man and a woman, is the starting point for families and the best place for children to grow up."

The same applies to gay couples who already have happy children, if you really believe in your statement.

The rest of your article (actually all of it) is a shallow attempt at undermining the relationships and existing families of homosexual couples. This particular writer is a gay man who is married in a country where marriage equality exists. On behalf of our (very stable, happy, nurturing) family, we're offended, but not quite "threatened" as you seem to be about our very real reality.

Gay Marriage Facts Put Plainly

2010-07-10T02:09:00.000-07:00

Five stars for producing a video that dispels some of the myths around gay marriage.

Growing Old as a Gay Person

2010-05-14T02:02:00.000-07:00

This month, IN THE LIFE explores what it means to grow old as a gay person – how what should be their golden years are new challenges living life openly gay.

“It’s About Time” highlights the leaders spearheading a national effort to protect the rights of LGBT senior citizens and care for our elders.

Here's a preview:

To download full episodes visit http://www.inthelifetv.org/

Acceptance: The Inevitable New Wave

2010-04-13T04:16:00.000-07:00

It is sometimes disheartening when you realise just how far behind the times the USA is compared to some other western countries when it comes to equality issues. Nevertheless, you can't deny the inevitable trend toward acceptance among the emerging, hyper aware younger population. It sounds savourless, but it really is a matter of waiting for the older generation to "die out".

Using national surveys and advances in opinion estimation, Jeffrey Lax and Justin Phillips from the Department of Political Science, Columbia University created estimates of state-level support for eight policies including civil unions and non-discrimination laws.

Read more about their work and download their paper here.

Give A Damn!

2010-04-06T08:30:00.000-07:00

Equality (we say this instead of "gay equality") is an issue on the forefront of human progress. There's no need to name the various groups and institutions of both the suffered and the adversaries. Like it or not, equality for gay people (not still not "gay equality" since we only want the same rights) is at the forefront of sociological topics today; be it in politics, religion, the work place and even the home.

Enter the much needed Give a Damn campaign.

Pushed by high profile celebrities and founded by Cyndi Lauper, it is an easy-to-understand tool for everyone, especially straight people, who care about gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender equality.

Check out the video below and join today.

The Gay Annual Meeting You Don't Know About

2010-04-06T08:06:00.000-07:00

MYTH:

There's a homosexual agenda and lifestyle. Gay people are out there to...

TRUTH:

The only thing gay people have in common is their sexual orientation. There really isn't a "community" as such as some discussions about gay people and gay rights all too often allude to. The focus of these topics are often misguidedly based on sex, linking gay men to paedophilia or evil.

LZ Granderson from CNN put it best:

"Being gay doesn't dictate how people live their lives any more than being straight does. There are gay people who go to church every Sunday and straight people who do not believe in God. There are single gay men who believe in the sanctity of marriage and married straight men who apparently do not.

We're just as diverse, intolerant, upstanding and tragic as our straight counterparts and unless there is an annual meeting I don't know about."

Read the rest of his article here.

Planning on getting married?

2010-04-04T14:07:00.000-07:00

Engaged volunteers needed!

The University of Virginia is looking for volunteers for a study of attitudes towards marriage and parenthood among engaged couples. The study consists of a 25-30 minute online survey. To qualify for the study, you must be 20-35 years old, live in the U.S.A., and plan to marry or have a commitment ceremony within the next 365 days. You and your romantic partner must not have children, and this must be the first marriage for both of you.

This is invaluable research on marriage and families within the gay community.

Cristina Reitz-Krueger is working with Dr. Charlotte J. Patterson, a Professor of Psychology at the institution. This study has been approved by the University of Virginia Institutional Review Board (#2009025800).

If you and/or your romantic partner are interested in participating or want further information, please contact:

Cristina Reitz-Krueger

Doctoral Student

University of Virginia

(434) 243-8558

survey.couples[REMOVE]@gmail.com

"There is no argument anymore"

2010-04-04T14:00:00.000-07:00

MYTH

There is not enough evidence to show that homosexuality
is biological in origin and not ultimately a personal choice

TRUTH

A unique Swedish study links sexual orientation and brain function. Published in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, it determined that straight men and gay women have a greater right sided activity, and gay men and straight women showed equal activation in both. The structure studied, which is larger in women than in men, connects the left and right temporal cortexes.

Previous experiments that have found differences in the brains of gay and straight people were sexual in nature. For the first time a study shows differences in functions not linked to sex or attraction, suggesting it has nothing to do with sexual behaviour and that there is a basic biological link between sexual orientation and brain function.

This research has emerged from an era of prejudice and fear and neurobiological research related to sexual orientation is only just gathering steam. The evidence shows that humans have a vast array of brain differences in relation to sexual orientation, not just gender. These mechanisms are set in the womb or during infancy as a result of genetic or hormonal factors.

The days are numbered when anti-gay groups can, with a smear of confidence, offer the opinion that homosexuality is a choice. According to Dr. Qazi Rahman, a lecturer in cognitive biology at the University of London, “There is no argument anymore - if you are gay, you are born gay”.

Not news to us, of course.

Sources:

"Sexual orientation and its basis in brain structure and function", D F. Swaab, Netherlands Institute for Neuroscience, July 2008
"The Return of the 'Gay Brain'", Neal McKenna, GAY Pages, March 2010

Childless Relationships Are Pointless

2010-03-22T09:02:00.001-07:00

Really? Even our straight friends beg to differ.

GayTruth Story: Who is your valentine? "Don’t ask… ahh… too late"

2010-02-11T19:06:00.000-08:00

MYTH:

Revealing who is gay in the military and abolishing
"Don't Ask, Don't Tell" is a threat to order.

TRUTH:

We're in 2010 and still we're flabbergasted at the pure ignorance and assumption relating to homosexuality. They exist okay? Whether you know someone is gay or not doesn't open up a Pandora's box of glitter and rainbow streamers. Even in the military.

Gay people are just like anyone else bar ONE difference. This difference is a part of the normal spectrum of human sexual orientations. Any other argument is just untrue. Having a minority sexual orientation (notice we NEVER use the word lifestyle?) doesn't make it a monstrous, determine their behaviour, professionalism intelligence or any other attribute.

Why does this fail to make sense to so many people?

Let's take the "Don't Ask Don't Tell" policy. To us, blowing it into humanity's list of historically embarrassing nonsense laws is a no-brainer. Instead, it is being blown out of proportion in a way that only inflates much of the gay mythology floating around in a "LaLa" Land of utter incomprehension.

Yet, sadly, conversations like the one below are still consuming oxygen:

We all know about the very brave Lt. Dan Choi who has spoken of the many other gay men and women who are fearful of coming out. Why should this be relevant? Here's one point we wish to make. Who isn't asked this question when working abroad, now that it is close to valentine's day:

do you have a wife/husband or loved one who you're missing?

It is a universal, human query. The military is full to the brim with stories of widowed wives, sharing photos of families and making that all important contact with the person you wish to spend the rest of your life with. These conversations are a part of human interaction, regardless of whether you're a military professional, an accountant or making elevator conversation. Yet, a gay person in the gay military is required to be mute. Why? Because the people who put forward DADT were/are ignorant on the topic of homosexuality. They think it is a behaviour. A lifestyle. A choice and perversion.

Let's all be honest here if we want to touch on sexual behaviour and behaving unprofessionally. There are too many instances to count of straight men in the military and their sexual activities (we won't offer any linkage here. Google the topic or ask a former officer. You'll find plenty of material). This particular writer knows a heterosexual navy friend who's captain allowed his unit to lure women onto the captain's chair at port as long as he "didn't catch you". No need to give the glory details, but this trophy heterosexual "behaviour" surely is an open and shut case for how destructive straight people are to the armed forces right? Of course, we're joking.

Nevertheless, the people who point their fingers at a gay military professionals aren't. They assume sexual misconduct by default, which is insulting and stupid.

This takes us to our latest Gay Truth story. We need more examples of the truth. Not middle aged homophobic "outsights". We give you Michael Anthony, an Iraq war veteran. He has an interesting story about how DADT is being used in a way that it was probably never intended for:

My name is Michael Anthony, I am an Iraq war veteran and having spent six years in the Army, at the age of twenty-three, I have spent more than a quarter of my life in service to this country. I have four older brothers and an older sister, all of whom have been in the military: Air Force, Marines and Army. My father and both my grandfathers were in the military.

Hailing originally for a small sheltered town just south of Boston Massachusetts, I say this in all earnestness: the only gay people I know have all been in the military. This is not a joke or some talking point, it’s literal. Generals, Commanders and Civilians can talk all they want, but the fact of the matter is, the only gay friends I've had have all been in the military, in fact, my only experience of gay people (outside of the military) is when I once watched and episode of the TV show Will and Grace (it was kind of funny).

For the policy known as DADT, there is one thing people often forget. People forget that the policy doesn’t preclude gay people from entering the military it just precludes them from talking about their homosexuality. In short, someone can be gay in the military; they just can’t talk about being gay in the military.

If people are already in the military and gay—from my former unit alone I know close to a dozen—what is it that people are afraid will happen with the repeal of DADT? Are people afraid that the day after DADT is rescinded; gay soldiers are going to walk in wearing a feather boa and buttless fatigues? The uniform policy will still be in effect so we can cross that option out. Are people afraid that it’s going to hurt troop morale? The Military suicide rate is at a thirty year high having consistently risen for the past five years, with eighteen veterans killing themselves everyday (according to the VA) so it seems like it can’t get any worse.

With everything said, there is a negative aspect to repealing DADT. Having been in the military all my adult years, my peer group is filled with Iraq and Afghanistan war veterans. Several of these war veterans having done two or three tours, have sworn that they will never go back to Iraq or Afghanistan. Upon further questioning on how they plan to get out deployment if called, their answer is simple: “don’t ask, don’t tell,” expounding further, they say that if they’re called up, they will simply kiss a member of the same sex—in front of their commander. So how is repealing DADT going to affect the military? The answer is simple…my friends who jokingly suggested using DADT as a way to get out of a deployment are now stuck going to Iraq or Afghanistan.

And please don’t even get me started on the escapades that go on overseas. But hey, what happens in Iraq stays in Iraq…ahh not quite.

Michael Anthony is the author of MASS CASUALTIES: A Young Medic’s True Story of Death, Deception and Dishonor in Iraq (Adams Media, October 2009). The book is drawn from the personal journals of Anthony during the 1st year he spent serving in Iraq. It is a non-partisan look at some of the escapades that go on behind the scenes in Iraq.

When myth makers want to hide the truth

2010-01-11T12:05:00.000-08:00

Prop 8 supporters and anti-equality organisations like the National Organization for Marriage have spent tens of millions of dollars on 30-second ads scaring the American people into thinking that same-sex marriage will destroy the USA. Now, when federal judges want to open the courtrooms to America, Prop 8 supporters want to unplug the TV.

To find out more, and to help make sure this historical event reaches the public, visit the Courage Campaign Website.

Exploiting the Myth

2010-01-06T08:51:00.000-08:00

Possibly most vulgar and destructive tool the anti-gay camp have up their sleeves is in the exploitation of the many people who are severely misinformed about the facts of homosexuality. We've seen this in Maine and California with Prop 8 when television ads unashamedly spoke of children at risk and marriage-destroying the gay "agenda" (how they're allowed to broadcast such rubbish is beyond our reasoning). We see this every time there's a hate related crime and the motivations behind them. We see it in the ant-gay side themselves with what they say, do and try to convince others of.

Yet, this one really takes the cake - when religious groups in the USA directly influence government mis-informed policy in Uganda to take people's lives:

For more information, click here.

Say NO to Anti-Human Rights Bill in Uganda

2010-01-04T14:36:00.000-08:00

Late last year Uganda introduced the Uganda Anti-Homosexuality Bill which would broaden the criminalisation of same-sex relationships, including the death penalty for repeat convictions.

This bill is being encouraged and pressured to move forward by evangelical groups that are providing "aid" such as Defend The Family. Their movements are based on propagating the myth and fear we continually fight on this website.

Please sign a petition that will be forwarded to Uganda's President Museveni, Members of the Commonwealth, Members of the UN.

Together, we can help ensure that the country does not take 10 steps back, to help support the fight against AIDS in Africa, and to stop the inevitable reduction of aid to the needy citizens of Uganda (which will happen if this law passes).

Half of Americans believe being gay is a choice

2010-01-02T22:34:00.000-08:00

A poll of 1,001 American voters has found that almost half believe being gay is something people choose.

The research found that 47 per cent of respondents thought homosexuality was a choice, while 46 per cent opposed gay marriage.

Why are we not surprised? No wonder the conservatives love to put gay civil rights to a people's vote. Democratic practice is flawed when comprised by the absence of good education in civil themes. This survey only outlines one of its potential dangers.

Read the rest of the article here

What a year... the gay movement in 2009

2009-12-31T01:39:00.000-08:00

What a year!

In 2009:

The assembly of the Church of Sweden voted strongly in favour of giving its blessing to homosexual couples, including the use of the term marriage,
Uganda introduced the Uganda Anti-Homosexuality Bill which would broaden the criminalisation of same-sex relationships, including the death penalty for repeat convictions,
California Passed 11 pieces of legislation. Hundreds, if not thousands of couples who marry around the world will have all the rights of marriage in California,
The New York State Assembly voted NO on gay marriage,
the governor of Maine legalised same-sex marriage in that state in Maine, USA; however, citizens voted to overturn that law when they went to the polls in November,
New Hampshire governor John Lynch signs legislation allowing same-sex marriage,
Portugal aims to permit marriage between same sex couples.
and the list goes on...

2009 was a memorable year of yoyo-ing back and forth in educating the masses on gay issues and gaining the rights we deserve as human beings.

2010 will no doubt continue in this trend as we strive to teach the reality of homosexuality, dispel the myths and move toward a better world community.

While we're at it, we've picked three organisations that we believe donating to will help with the cause:

In The Life. Documentary stories from the gay experience, one of the only unbiased media outlets for the gay community.
Equality California. The Prop 8 saga was probably the most demoralising setbacks, especially when the gay movement failed to get Proposition 8 overturned earlier this year.
The RDFS. Not necessarily a gay rights campaign, but very much a one for free thinking, including the acceptance of homosexuality as a part of the natural spectrum of human sexual orientation.

Together we can make a difference as we support the people and movements that help spread the truth.

On that note, see you in 2010!

-Gay Truth

New York State's Gay Marriage Vote - The Dissapointment

2009-12-30T13:58:00.000-08:00

Myth

We can rely on the Democratic and non-conservative parties
to move us forward on equality issues.

Truth

"I don't understand how any of us could vote no" - neither do we.

On December 2nd, 2009 the New York State Senate voted on a bill that would legalise same-gender marriages and at the same time protect religious institutions who wish to abstain from performing these marriages. The measure failed 24-38, with 8 Democrats and all 30 Republicans voting against.

This video looks into the reaction that followed the vote, and asks how we can be better activists in the fight for our civil rights.

Senator Diane Savino gave a passionate speech on the floor of the Senate in favor of the same-sex marriage bill. The video of her speech has become a YouTube hit.

For more video links and information visit the IN THE LIFE website.

Let's Ban Divorce!

2009-12-29T14:56:00.000-08:00

This video is of course not meant to be completely serious, although the issue it is targeting is very much so. Titled "2010 MARRIAGE PROTECTION ACT Signature Drive", Travis from YouTube has created a very witty video that alludes to the mockery that was the Californian Marriage Protection act that took away the right for homosexuals to get married.

RescueMarriage.org is the brain-child of concerned Christian and political activist John Marcotte, who felt strongly that Prop 8 did not go far enough in protecting traditional marriage. With the help of attorneys and friends, Marcotte is attempting to ban divorce in the State of California.

It doesn't take a genius (or does it?) to realise that that anti-gay marriage organisations such as NOM and Focus on the Family have no real desire to do with "protecting marriage". Their movement to ban gay marriage is a direct homophobic attack on gay people based on myths and fear mongering.

It makes total sense that these organisations would support the mock movement of this video. After all, they're using the same arguments:

Getting back to 'old' values. Divorce wasn't always legal.
Its all about protecting families. We all know the best families are those where there are two parents (of the opposite sex, that is) are living under the same roof. Right?
It makes a mockery of marriage. What can undermine marriage more than divorce?
It will protect the children! The creme de la creme of arguments. We don't want children learning about divorce now, do we?

Featured Reading: "Is It A Choice?"

2009-12-26T14:32:00.000-08:00

Initially released in the mid 1990's, Eric Marcus produced an updated sings-of-the-times version of his highly acclaimed book "Is It A Choice? Answers to the Most Frequently Asked Questions About Gay and Lesbian People".

Yes, we have come a long way in achieving acceptances and education relating to homosexuality, but everyone knows there's still a high mountain to climb when it comes to the common misconceptions out there. Homosexuality is still very much a taboo, even in the Western World. This is only so true when we hear about the marriage law saga and appalling television commercials produced by anti-gay groups.

This book is perfect for gay and pro-gay individuals who need that extra bit of affirmation and perfect rebuttal up their sleeves when they hear the dreaded "if it doesn't fit, then how can it be normal?" and "you just need to wait until the right person comes along?" questions. Likewise, for those of you who are completely convinced homosexuality IS a choice and haven't yet heard a convincing argument, then this book is for you too.

Basically, if you have a question, more than likely, you'll find it in this book.

The beauty though, is that Eric's arguments are not bogged down by religious bias (which we know can often turn into a tail chasing case). He writes well and incorporates a sense of humour that keeps the topic light hearted. He delves into the realm of gays in the military, sexual practices, dating, marriage, gays in the workplace without putting anyone on the defensive.

This is a book we wish would be on the shelves on every high school's library. As a resource, it is simply a must to the 10% or so youth out there who need a sanity check.

If you can't come up with the answers for "that" gay question fast, this book pretty much answers them all.

Grab a copy today:

I Am An Ex Gay

2009-12-13T13:23:00.000-08:00

MYTH:

I am an ex gay. You can be too!
There's no harm in trying to be straight.

TRUTH:

Sure. Right. We believe you! Not.

The ex-gay movement is perhaps the most dangerous movement to gay people that there is, in more ways than you might think.

Some notes:

Ex-gay movements destroy people's lives and breaks apart families.
In The Life have made an excellent documentary depicting various instances of the harm this idea does.
It spreads mis-information about homosexuality.
Especially the lie that your sexual orientation is a choice.
It simply doesn't work.
We've written about several instances of people denying their sexual orientation, being caught in the act. Instead of admitting that they're not straight, they choose to hide behind a blanket of regret and human fallacy in the hope of forgiveness.
It kills people.
We're not talking about suicide here. Ideas like those of ex-gay Richard Cohen (we're so willing to place a bet there) and Rick Warren actually influence people and governments to push ideas, practises and laws that not only take gay people's rights away, but in the case of Uganda, take their lives (although these individuals haven't pulled the trigger, they certainly left behind some smoke).

So, back to the "you can be straight too!" line. We simply know this as one of the stickiest myths out there. Jonathan Jones from Queer Life doesn't either. He begins by telling Richard Cohen' story:

"I watched the telly with great interest when Rachel Maddow interviewed ex-gay Richard Cohen on her show. Richard was an out gay man who came to Christianity in his earlier life and believes that Jesus gave him the power to be free of his homosexuality and thus ever since has traveled about telling other gays the 'good news' which has led thousands of people away from the homosexual 'lifestyle.' "

Read the rest of his article here.

Civil Partnership Laws Protect Gays

2009-10-06T02:48:00.001-07:00

MYTH:
"Gay partners already have the same rights and protections as straight people"

TRUTH:

We could go on forever arguing why marriage equality is only the start of reaching true equal status in the eyes of the law AND the community in general. Nothing speaks louder than the pudding though. Check out this blog post by The Michelangelo Signorile Show about a real life family's struggle.

Bill O'Reilly - The Myth Bluster

2009-07-20T16:58:00.000-07:00

If we were to put a face to the many homo myths out there, we'd be hard to go past Bill O'Reilly. Not many people can hawk on like a 1780s gay 'fact' file like this man (burn the witches!).

More after this clip:

Bill O'Reilly - lesbian cutest couple
Uploaded by worldhappiness. - News videos hot off the press.

Laura Burman politely rebuts the ill-informed man gracefully; if not with an air of amusement at just how backward this man thinks, regardless of whatever delusional logic he decides to spin inside his narrow mind.

Nevertheless, we feel the need to re-affirm (*sigh*) the truth, point by (*sigh*, again) point:

MYTH:
"Socially it is much more difficult to be a homosexual than a heterosexual in America."

TRUTH:
This is true, due to the mis information and stigma painted by people like Bill O'Reilly. The challenge isn't homosexuality, it is homophobia and some people's desire to make it out to be something that it isn't.

MYTH:
"Religiously, there are people who believe that that kind of a lifestyle is against their religion and they pass that onto their children."

TRUTH:
Homosexuality is NOT a lifestyle! We believe religion shouldn't ever play a part in a public education setting. Gayness can't be "passed" onto other students. Sexual orientation is something you are born with, not chosen, regardless of "experimentation".

MYTH:
"An exposition of sexuality in a minor situation is inappropriate in an academic setting."

TRUTH:
Coming out or declaring a relationship at school is no more a sexual exposition than someone declaring they are heterosexual and are partnered. Sexuality is something that develops in all teenagers. Homosexual teens have the same right to express themselves and develop normally as their heterosexual counterparts. Sending a message that they should hide their feelings is unnatural and dangerous to their self esteem and health.

MYTH:
"There is no reason why homosexuals have to declare themselves more than anything other than friends."

TRUTH:
There is every reason why homosexuals should be open and truthful of who they are. It is important to their self esteem and normal social and sexual development. It also helps develop a society who isn't blinded by an artificial view of spectrum of natural sexual orientation.

Phew! We doubt good ol' Bill will ever read or absorb this message, but it sure feels good being on the truth's side!

GayTruth Story: "I would have died without them"

2009-07-08T12:40:00.000-07:00

Cody Derrick grew up in a conservative Mormon home in the suburbs of Salt Lake City, Utah. At the age of 21, shortly after returning from his mission, Cody came out that he was gay. This is Cody Derrick's coming out story; a story of religion, fear, and family.

Although we're still not sure if his family are "hate the sin, not the sinner" believers, we're so glad Cody has found the strength and support he desperately needed from his immediate family. In his own words, he expresses how devastated he is "for all of those kids who couldn't figure out that it was better to be gay than than dead".

It is truly a devastating reality for the millions of gay people out there who have either succumb to thoughts of suicide, or live a life scarred with self hate. To all the gay people out there who aren't as lucky to have accepting parents, we hope this story brings you comfort in knowing this isn't always the way things turn out.

It Will Hurt The Bottom Line

2009-07-05T02:33:00.000-07:00

MYTH:
"Gay marriage will burden small business."
-Michael Steele

TRUTH:
What the?! We find this almost too brain dead to debate.
But Keith Olbermann takes the time to explain how silly this statement is.

It's Tradition!

2009-06-23T02:25:00.000-07:00

MYTH:
We can not allow homosexuals to marry simply
because it is against tradition.

TRUTH:
If it were a simple matter of tradition, then this would be reality today:

Written and Directed by Keith Hartman

How Would You Feel?

2009-05-16T01:46:00.000-07:00

MYTH:
We all know what the myths are...

TRUTH:
How would you feel?

Written and Directed by Keith Hartman

"Marriage?" "Family?" Fake!

2009-05-11T02:56:00.000-07:00

MYTH:
Gay "marriage" and "families" aren't real.
They're not stable or valid.

TRUTH:
Keeping it real...

Refusal To Broadcast The Truth

2009-05-02T07:11:00.000-07:00

It really annoys us when an opportunity arises to express truth that is shut down by bureaucratic nonsense. GetToKnowUsFirst.org's (rather benign) paid ad about two gay African American men raising a child were rejected during Super Bowl programming. Read their media release here. Their 'controversial' ad below:

Although other advocacy ads were broadcast, this one failed to air and we're disappointed it lost its chance to reach such a wide audience.

Please support GetToKnowUsFirst.org by sharing this ad with others.

Too Straight To Be Gay

2009-02-15T10:31:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
"You're too straight for the part of Will!"
-Will and Grace executive producers

TRUTH:

We just love stories of real gay men being knocked back from playing gay roles on TV because they're "not gay enough". It chips at the stereotypical lies we're taught by the media.

John Barrowman, who plays Captain Jack Harkness in the Torchwood series, was under consideration for the role of Will in the popular US series Will and Grace. The producers felt he was "too straight", so the role went to Eric McCormack instead.

John has also been with his partner Scott Gill since 1993 and they had a civil partnership ceremony in 2006. So much for gay men being fickle...

Homies Are Anti-Gay

2009-02-12T15:03:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
Rappers and Hip-Hop artists are anti gay by default.

TRUTH:

Of course, this isn't really true. We're joking.
Yet for the element where there might be some truth in this:

We do want to perfect a point though, just in case there is any confusion:

Homosexuality is not a choice or a lifestyle (which by now, shouldn't be an explosive revelation)

A Truth Hearing For Prop 8

2009-02-03T23:02:00.001-08:00

California Supreme Court to Hear Oral Arguments in Prop 8 Legal Challenge on March 5

"Fidelity": Don't Divorce... from Courage Campaign on Vimeo

The California Supreme Court announced today that it will hear oral arguments on Thursday, March 5, 2009 in the Proposition 8 legal challenge.

On November 19, 2008, the California Supreme Court agreed to hear the legal challenges to Proposition 8 and set an expedited schedule. Briefing in the case was completed on January 21, 2009.

Proposition 8 passed by a bare majority of 52 percent on November 4 and eliminated a fundamental right only for same-sex couples. No other initiative has ever successfully changed the California Constitution to take away a right only from a targeted minority group.

[more info here]

We just hope that the reasoned word of truth finally wins out.

Coming Out Isn't Enough

2009-02-03T06:44:00.000-08:00

The truth is out there and we're all for telling it how it is. The gay community faces an increasing wall of myth that can only be broken down by the many stories real people offer. Putting a human face to gay families and individuals adds an extra dimension to the message.

That is why we love the Tell 3 concept. It is a campaign encouraging LGBT people to share their life stories with at least three different people.

We'll be contributing to these stories in the next few weeks so be sure to subscribe to our RSS feed or bookmark this page.

Real people. Real lives. Real truth.

I Have Two Fathers

2009-01-31T01:33:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
Having two fathers or two mothers is a social experiment
that puts children at risk.

TRUTH:

Here's a clip from the Dutch version of "Most Talented Kid" in which young Terence and a chorus of teens and pre-teens sing about his banally normal family life: Terence and his "two real fathers".

Note too that with same-sex marriage legal in the Netherlands, Terence does not live in a legal limbo with no certainty about who has responsibility for his well being. There's no question about who can make educational or medical decisions for him, or who will take care of him if one of his parents passes away in an untimely manner. Terence recognises this even if he sings mostly about homely things, like how his fathers are "sometimes cool and sometimes strict" and how the three of them "watch soaps on TV".

The truth is, whether or not our societies accept differing definitions of families, gay parents have and will always exist; either openly or hidden behind a story to pacify those less comfortable with the concept. Gay fathers in the late 1970s often parented their children while part of a heterosexual partnership, even for men who identified as homosexual. This is clearly the result of pre-defined social mouldings. Statistics show today that 1.6 million gay American men are married to women. Of these, a percentage of their wives and children are aware of their sexual orientation. Gay people have the same desires to raise children and sometimes fall to the social expectation that dictates this can only be filled in a traditional heterosexual family. Warning bells anyone?

Thankfully, today's view of whether gay parenting is risky is becoming ever more trivial. There are growing examples of children raised by gay parents who have emerged into adulthood as successful, loving heterosexuals. Even so, we hear of countless cases where gay parents require legal intervention to assure their family's legal standing. A same-sex couple in California USA recently won a federal court ruling that their adopted son's birth certificate include both the names of their legal parents. Besides the practical and emotional reasons for pushing this case forward, this debate wouldn't have been one if his adoptive parents were heterosexual.

Just because someone is a homosexual and is in a homosexual relationship it doesn't hinder their ability to be good parents; neither does it affect a child's development. The more the definition of what makes a parent and a family is broadened and redefined, the more potential for love a child has.

Gays Are Attacking Us

2009-01-29T22:14:00.000-08:00

MYTHS:
Too many times we read and hear from the anti-gay side
how gay people are threatening their livelihoods and safety.

Homosexuals are...
"taking away our rights"
"attacking our religious institutions"
"bashing the Bible"
"abusing people with different views"
"threatening our jobs"
"criminalizing freedom of speech"
"defaming Christianity"

TRUTH:

These are strong words, but we invite them all to check their dictionaries. Intolerance, hate speech and bashing toward homosexuals often involve the loss of blood and lives. Can they claim the same?

A Web Of Myths

2009-01-28T07:58:00.000-08:00

MYTH:

TRUTH:

We just can't believe the continual train wreck of myths this interview has spun.
Thankfully, our friends at Good As You have taken it upon them to reinforce the truths.

A Father's Perspective

2009-01-22T13:18:00.000-08:00

Many of the religion verses homosexuality battles we've come across have been an "us verses them" affair.

Religion = "we hate homosexuals". Homosexual = "religions hate us".

It is a rare occurrence when we meet these two forces personified in one voice trying to find stable ground. Pastor Geoff Farrow is a Catholic priest who, after having been asked by his bishop to instruct his followers to vote against gay marriage, spoke out about the injustices and morality of such action. We can't help but wonder how many priests over the centuries have felt a moral bell sound in their minds when given instruction to oppress a minority group. Even when science and social understanding have taught us otherwise.

We invite you to Pastor Geoff Farrow's blog. The following are some quotes we believe are relevant to this site:

TRUTH:

"In directing the faithful to vote 'Yes' on Proposition 8, the California Bishops are not merely entering the political arena, they are ignoring the advances and insights of neurology, psychology and the very statements made by the Church itself that homosexuality is innate"
"The greatest fear that [an adolescent discovering they are gay] would have is that they would be rejected by the people they love the most—their family. So, their solution is to try to pass as straight, deceive, and in effect—lie. Of course, this leads ultimately to self loathing."
"How exactly is society helped by singling out a minority and excluding them from the union of love and life, which is marriage? How is marriage protected by intimidating gay and lesbian people into loveless and lonely lives? ... Worse still, is to intimidate a gay or lesbian person into a heterosexual marriage, which is doomed from its inception, and makes two victims..."

[Read the entire blog entry]

The dirty "A" word

2009-01-20T23:56:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
Nature made the anus for just one purpose.
Not for sex.

TRUTH:

Actually, this is true! It is obvious that the anus was made for elimination. That is a fact.

But, is this a valid argument against homosexuality?

Consider these points:

lesbians do not generally engage in anal sex
not all gay men enjoy or have anal sex
some straight people enjoy and participate in anal sex

Obviously this is not an exclusively homosexual act and is a poor argument against homosexuality. The truth is, some animals do have anal and other forms of sex. It isn't exclusively a human thing either. We're not condoning or encouraging any particular act, we're just saying its out there and its not a gay thing.

Just as with any group of people, there is a huge range of sexual activity that gay men and lesbians participate in, including being celibate and not having sex at all!

That being said, there is still an overwhelming obsession with this imagery when dealing with homophobic commentary. This mental "blockage" provides a frustrating barrier in cleanly describing what homosexuality is and isn't.

We can't help but say: this is one rather stinky myth!

Ex Gay Programs Work

2009-01-18T14:18:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
Ex gay programs give homosexuals who are unhappy
with their sexual orientation a chance to change.
They offers hope and healing.

TRUTH:

Gays Have The Rights They Need

2009-01-16T10:07:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
Gays already have all the rights and protections
they need. They don't need "full equality".

TRUTH:

Bisexuality Means Polygamy

2009-01-09T05:16:00.000-08:00

MYTH:

"Advocates of gay marriage should also be vocally in favour
of polygamy since it allows bisexuals to be actively
practising married bisexuals."
- Lee Stranahan

TRUTH:

Bisexuals are not inherently poly-amorous. Bisexuality is the attraction to both genders. Not a relationship with both. It is really that simple, without the addition of any other assumptions including faith and identity issues.

It Is Religious Freedom, Not Bigotry

2009-01-07T01:38:00.000-08:00

MYTH(S):

"We aren't bigots. We are just exercising our religious right
to express what we believe."

"Gays and Lesbians aren't affected by homophobia like other
minorities have suffered through murders and genocide."

TRUTH:

Although we have no issue with religious expression, we do have an issue when this is turned into action that directly affects gays and lesbians in a negative way. Such action can be very devastating, yet somewhat hidden from public view.

We'd like to feature In The Life Media's 26-minute episode, Ties That Bind. It provides numerous discussion prompts around the gay equality movement, the role religion has played in dividing it, and the values all of our communities share that can become harder to see as a result.

Homosexuality is incompatible with military service

2009-01-05T23:37:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
Openly gay and lesbian military personnel undermines
the efficacy of the armed forces.

TRUTH:

Openly gay and lesbian military personnel undermines the efficacy of the armed forces to the same extent that openly straight personnel do.

Unfortunately, the current "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policies of the USA military prohibits anyone who "demonstrate(s) a propensity or intent to engage in homosexual acts". This bans any homosexual or bisexual person from disclosing his or her sexual orientation or from speaking about any homosexual relationships, including marriages or other familial attributes, while serving in the United States armed forces. Woah!

Let us take a little trip down military lane:

The forcible taking of women’s sexual choice has been used as a way of attacking one’s enemies since ancient times. Often, the troops are specifically told to rape women, (as it was with American troops in the Vietnam War) as a way of demoralising the people who were being invaded. In Bosnia-Herzegovnia, rape has been used as a way of ‘ethnic cleansing’. So what are the steps taken to prevent these acts from occurring? Far less than the steps to prevent gays and lesbians from serving openly in the armed forces!

We ask this:

How can a gay military officer who declares he/she is in a loving, committed and mutual relationship be almost immediately discharged when clearly, it is heterosexual "behaviour" that perpetrates far more readily than the number of homosexual people in the armed forces?

Such discrimination toward personnel should surely be extended to the culturally destructive heterosexual variation. We can't help but feel that anti-gay polities stem from misinformation of "gay behaviour" and what is perceived as "homosexual conduct".

The resources to keep such policies in place is beyond comprehensible. Since 1994 almost 12, 000 USA military persons have been discharged due to homosexuality at a cost of almost $400 million. These are people with specialised fields of expertise, who would otherwise be of invaluable service if not for the fact of their sexual orientation. Furthermore, there are are over 1 million gay veterans in the USA who are without the legal spousal benefits that they should be entitled to.

Thankfully, most of the western world have military policies that allow gay men and lesbians to serve openly, including the United Kingdom, Australia, Germany and Switzerland.

Thank goodness for common sense!

The Bible Says So

2009-01-03T08:38:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
Conservative Christianity does not hate homosexuals.
It does not regard them as unequal. It does not have a
problem with being born gay, or feeling homosexual. It
simply regards homosexual sex as sinful. In the same way it
might regard anything else as sinful without hating anyone
who might be included. The Bible says so.

TRUTH:

The notion that homosexual sex is a sin just makes us want to scream! Although we usually tread lightly on religious issues, we feel the impact of some of their messages as dangerous and enough to warrant this entry.

We put out the "far fetched" notion that the Bible, which was written hundreds of generations ago, has most likely been edited, added to, misconstrued and misinterpreted more often than the faithful would want to admit. We can't prove that this text wasn't originally made with Godly inspiration, however it has existed throughout the ages on this Earth, with human guardians. People who are capable of corruption, who have their own agendas of their time (the straight, white, male agenda?). The influence of which has alluded to sexism, gender bias, the inferiority of coloured people, and even left handers. To ignore the fallibility of the Bible is truly a defining moment of blind faith.

If the Chinese to English translation of our computer screen instruction manuals are at times humorously inaccurate, how can we not say the Bible isn't a vastly fallible piece of work based on its many translations throughout the ages?

If the Bible didn't exist, there would be no moral, scientific or social reason why the homosexual orientation would be wrong. Nature has proven many times that it is just as normal as left handedness. To the enlightened and correctly educated, the notion that homosexuality is immoral wouldn't be thought of.

You can't compare being gay to prostitution, murder, or taking drugs. Homosexuality is just a normal part of the spectrum of sexual orientations. This, of course, is regardless of the sexual act. Straight people engage in anal sex more often than lesbians. So let us move on from that.

To those who wish to hide behind the veil of of hating "sin not the sinner", we'd like to put forward one silly possibility. That those who believe this may need to consider the reality that some parts of Christianity is based on motives that are less than holy. Including the gay lie.

Gays Are Immature

2008-12-30T03:43:00.000-08:00

MYTH:

Basically, Rick Warren tells us that homosexuals
should control their pre-defined sexual desires.
Those who can not are emotionally immature.

TRUTH:

Here is the difference:

Warren has the inclination to have sex with every beautiful woman he sees (God forbid!), on account of his biological predispositions. What straight male doesn't (and a certain percentage certainly does!). But, Rick still has the right and the acceptability to marry ONE and call her a life long partner.

If a gay person, who has a biological predisposition toward the same sex (and yes, naturally attracted to many a beautiful same sex form), wishes to be with ONE loved partner in a mutual relationship, why is that wrong? How is that fundamentally different? How is that harmful to themselves or others? Should they remain celibate?

Silly Rick Warren:

Homosexuality is a part of the normal, healthy spectrum of sexual orientations. Regardless of what your religious texts tell you. Please don't compare it to disruptive human behaviour such as violence and sex addiction. Homosexuality isn't a behaviour.

-GayTruth

Our religious beliefs don't hurt gays!

2008-12-28T06:02:00.000-08:00

MYTH:

"The gay community constantly asks: If we want to marry, how
does it hurt you? Here’s a similar question: If religious people
don’t approve of homosexual behavior, how does it hurt you?"
-Ben Shapiro

TRUTH:

BEHAVIOUR should never be confused with SEXUAL ORIENTATION!

We've said this once and we will say this again: Homosexuals are no different to their straight counterparts. The only difference is their sexual orientation. Period.

Being gay does not and should not affect other aspects of their social and personal lives, aspirations and life accomplishments. Depictions of homosexual lifestyles are stereotyped and exaggerated. The evidence of such allusions are more a result of the destructive influence of an anti-gay society than sexuality itself.

Back to the hurt part...

The fact is, religious institutions who try to influence civil laws that affect homosexuals and their families DO hurt gay people. We are all for religious freedom, and the right for these individuals and groups to practise the religion they choose. What we don't approve of is when these ideologies extend to influence the lives of minorities such as homosexuals in a negative way.

Here are some examples of how this DOES hurt gays and lesbians:

using church funds to influence laws that affect homosexual people and families in a negative way,
using church funds to spread mis-information about homosexuals to the general population,
homosexuals who are born into religious families who do not approve of homosexuality,
the very negative and very real destructive influences of religious leaders sending messages that homosexuality is less valid and natural than heterosexuality,
the violence, depression, confusion and self abuse resulting from the affects of aforementioned.

Gay marriage will in no way affect the heterosexual marriage, or marriage itself. It WILL, however, help validate the families that already exist. It WILL be psychologically supportive in promoting the reality that homosexuals, gay parents and children of gay parents are equal. It WILL help promote education that homosexuals are just like heterosexuals in the way they live, their wants, needs, lifestyle, and yes... behaviour!

In fact, it DOES everything we have mentioned above through observation of what has actually happened in countries and states that have made this civil right legal, regardless of whatever mis-information has been depicted to mask this reality.

Homosexuality Is A European Invention

2008-12-13T11:36:00.000-08:00

MYTH:

"Homosexuality is solely and unequivocally a European sexual lifestyle that has spread around the world, just like all European cultures, languages and religions. The first mention of male homosexual behaviours in world history is Ancient Greece."
-dabeesta17 (Youtube User)

TRUTH:

We will say this again: homosexuality IS NOT a lifestyle. It is a sexual orientation.

You do not require to have sex to know they are homosexual. It exists in all cultures and religions. The difference being some cultures have evolved to a point where they recognise homosexuality as a normal part of the spectrum of human sexual orientation - regardless of religious or social stigma.

Although some cultures may choose to deny its existence within the community, one thing is certain: the fact you can hide homosexuality doesn't imply it any less real or common than in cultures where it is more widely visible. It is like saying there are fewer registered cases of divorce in Arab nations compared to the USA because the former is happier than the latter. We're sure both cultures experience the same level of relationship fall outs, but one obviously embraces the concept of divorce more than death by stoning.

Finally, it is more widely documented in recent history of men marrying 12 year old girls, using marriage as a way of financial arrangement, and polygamy as socially acceptable. There are some cultures in Africa that find it acceptable to father many children with different women as a sign of good fertility. Yet this doesn't reflect at all badly on the heterosexual "lifestyle".

Being Gay Is Debatable

2008-12-12T10:55:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
"Being born gay is debatable. Being born female or without limbs
or mentally challenged or black are facts of life."
-dabeesta17 (Youtube User)

TRUTH:

We are sure some black people would hide their blackness if they could. In the predominantly white, male dominated western society, fitting in is a way for survival for minorities. Just because something isn't a physical phenomena, or that we don't fully understand it, it doesn't mean it is an less real or a less fact of being.

Left Handed Marriage Is Unnatural

2008-12-08T11:50:00.000-08:00

MYTH:

TRUTH:

Of course, the caller was probably not convinced that homosexuals aren't any different than left handers. Gay people are all promiscuous and addicted to sex right? Just like left handers only write obscenities and are the main cause of graffiti. Right? Something like that.

You can be ex-gay, but not ex-black!

2008-12-06T10:22:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
"You can be ex-gay, but I can't be ex-black"
-an African American woman on Dr Phil

TRUTH:

Of course you can. Just look at Michael Jackson!

On a serious note, we're serious! Ex-gay people are just as ex-gay as Michael Jackson is an ex-black. It is a skin deep transition. You can't change your sexual orientation. Ex-gay ministries can only claim a change in outward behaviour.

We invite you to watch this video (again):

I'm Not Gay!

2008-12-05T10:39:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
"I'm not gay. We all sin. I don't do that stuff anymore."

TRUTH:

We believe internal homophobia is possibly the most damaging barrier to the gay community today. This is especially strong when taboo and deep social/religious messaging is involved. Here are some examples of people in religious and influential positions who've expressed strong views against homosexuals, only to have fallen by homosexual "scandals":

Catholic sex abuse cases - of both heterosexual and homosexual cases, where the official stance from the Vatican is focused on filtering out ministers with "homosexual tendencies".
Mark Foley - A Republican member of the United States House of Representatives who was involved in homosexual sexual liaisons and Internet contact with teen-aged boys for over ten years. He denied these claims describing them as "revolting".
Ted Haggard - A Christian American evangelical preacher who paid a mail prostitute to engage in sex with him for three years. His earlier responses strongly denied these accusations. Upon admitting the truth, he described them as "sexual immorality" and as "repulsive and dark". He taught that homosexuality was an abomination and actively lobbied against gay rights.
Larry Craig - An American politician from the state of Idaho caught soliciting sex from an undercover cop in an airport bathroom. His stance against homosexuals include a clarification that he would vote "yes" on a constitutional amendment banning same-sex marriages. He also voted not to extended the federal definition of hate crimes to cover sexual orientation.
Bob Allen - An American politician who was a Republican member of the Florida House of Representatives and made a sexual proposal to a police man. He was one of the twenty one Florida legislators to sign a brief supporting the state’s ban on gays adopting children.

Notice that the denial and even acceptance statements are intensely degrading to the homosexual orientation. Use of language such as "revolting", "immoral" and "dark" is an example of internal homophobia in action. Organisations connected to these people are quick to sweep it under the rug and call them bad apples. There is just no room for acceptance.

The key (and saddest) point we wish to make is that none of the above examples include acceptance of sexual orientation. Through the filter of their beliefs, they still hold the view that homosexuality is a sin under the eyes of God; that their actions are an example of giving into a sin. Of course, this a completely misinformed standpoint. Ted Haggard has been known to claim that Christians do not need to think beyond the Bible on moral issues; that the Bible tells you what is right and wrong without argument. This only outlines the unfortunate consequence of such blind faith.

Another point we make is the nature of the sexual scandals. We are not condoning prostitution, indecent public exposure, pornography, or any other particular form of sexual activity. We do ask:

Why and what kind of people (not just homosexuals) feel that they need to take these paths? Can it be related to individuals who are required to hinder their natural sexual desire?
Could these acts be the result of social expectation, and finding an underground way to meet their sexual needs?
If a person is homosexual and needs to suppress their sexuality, what other choice do they have apart from abstaining from it altogether?
Is this suppression healthy or correct, regardless of religious beliefs?
How does this differ from religious requirement that impose restrictions to other desires, teachings, attire and consumables?

The only unnatural acts we see here are the very unhealthy attempts to suppress sexual orientation. Of course, we're (still) talking about homosexuality as a normal, natural and valid part of human sexuality; and how its repression can be dangerous.

Something more to think about:

Gay People Are More Likely To Cheat

2008-12-04T10:35:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
Gay people are more likely to cheat and hit their
partners than those in "normal" relationships.

TRUTH:

It is true that there is one key factor that makes homosexual relationships different to heterosexual ones. It isn't what most people think though: the fact that they are homosexual. The key difference is their placement within a predominately homophobic society. The lack of positive, visible examples of homosexual pairings. The uncertainty of family support. We cover this is more detail in our myth entry "Gay Relationships Don't Work".

It is often easy to to make a statistical conclusion like "gay people are more likely to cheat" without examining the full picture. Apart from the fact that many very committed and successful gay couples choose not to publicise their relationships for fear of social isolation, there are also key social factors as to why these relationships suffer from a greater occurrence of the challenges that even heterosexual couples face. It is all about an overall lack of support and nurture for these relationships.

Just Another Mythunderstanding

2008-12-03T14:40:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
I can convince you that homosexuality is...
(every myth under the flat sun)

TRUTH:

Some groups of people still argue that the planet is flat. Sometimes it is easier to wrap a mythical notion in logic based on misconceptions, religious teaching, fear and ignorance rather than to accept the truth. It is much harder though to prove the Earth has four corners when we've had the blessing of making our way into space to see the big picture.

People who believe in the many myths about homosexuality can logically bury themselves in a dented notion, regardless of where the myth was seeded. They just haven't seen the big picture. Hopefully, one day, we will all be enlightened enough to realise that sexual orientation is was never, ever flat. Nor will you fall off its edge.

Harmful Homosexuality

2008-12-02T14:27:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
Homosexuality is a problem and is
harmful to themselves and to others.

TRUTH:

Of the many perceived "risks" associated with homosexuality, these are never directly attributed to the actual sexual orientation, or even their sexual acts. We have touched on this subject before. We know that the homosexual social desire, needs, and lifestyle is parallel to their heterosexual counterparts.

In light of provoking a little more thought into this topic, we ask:

Does homosexuality...

deprive them of anything apart from a socially unacceptable expectation?
make them less capable of loving?
make them run slower?
directly pre-dispose them to obesity?
cause blindness?
make them any less intelligent?
harm anyone physically?
decrease their life span?
...we are done with insulting your intelligence!

The truth is, (and if you have been paying attention to Gay Truth) the answer to all of these is a bold NO.

What is the problem apart from the fear and misunderstanding people have of homosexuality?

Technically No Good

2008-12-01T14:18:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
Technically, homosexuality isn't natural.
Humans are meant to reproduce.

TRUTH:

The "technicalities" of sexuality and nature in general isn't something we endeavour to scope through here, but technically...

some people are born with both genitals and have fulfilling sexual lives,
some species thrive and depend on the inclusion of homosexuality,
we are not advanced in our understanding of homosexuality to make any conclusions on whether this state is technically incorrect,
left handed people aren't normal because most things are made for right-handedness, and
homosexuals CAN and DO reproduce in the many alternative ways that are technically available to heterosexuals.

The Mardi Gras Lifestyle Showcase

2008-11-30T13:21:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
The Gay Mardi Gras is just a big party where gay
people demonstrate their alternative lifestyle.

TRUTH:

Many Mardi Gras traditions around the world began as political demonstrations. These events of protest were sometimes marked by violence, police abuse and arrests. Nowdays the Mardi Gras may feature gay marchers who are police themselves. It has taken on a much larger and flamboyant celebration compared to its origins in the 1960s and 1970s, transforming into a major tourist attraction and drawing in millions in economic benefits to their hosting cities. The Mardi Gras has also sparked significant positive social changes for gays and lesbians.

Although this event will always be a political one, some people (even in the gay community) wonder whether it is losing its impact for positive social change. Much of the exposure in media is based on the sexual, vulgar and flamboyant. There is a feeling that the message is losing itself to a distorted view of the homosexual community. The twenty seconds of news coverage on television is sensational rather than educational. It no longer represents the true nature of homosexuality.

Often, it takes the next step of actually meeting a gay person, a gay couple, and their families to realise there isn't much different between them and the heterosexual counterparts. That it is simply a difference in sexual orientation. Nothing more or less.

Per Capita Danger

2008-11-29T15:03:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
Homosexuals are much more dangerous to our
children on a per capita basis. Even though there are less
homosexuals than heterosexuals, a larger percentage are paedophiles.

TRUTH:

If this statement is true (we know it's not), then...

...can we claim the same for priests on a per capita basis?

Are we talking about a sexual orientation, or a
sexually repressed group , and the consequences thereof?

An Evolved Mythconception

2008-11-28T14:43:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
In a world where only the fit survive, homosexuals are
doomed to rapid extinction. From an evolutionary perspective, the
homosexual community is inferior to the heterosexual community.

TRUTH:

Homosexuality will always exist as long as heterosexuals (and yes, homosexuals) have children. It is a part of nature. Within the animal kingdom, a certain percentage of the population are not heterosexual. To assume the homosexual purpose in nature is cancerous based on their inability to pro-create is short sighted.

We do not claim to know why homosexuality exists, but there have been studies to show groups of lions who benefit socially from the existence of homosexuality. This is in the form of a larger adult population to nurture and protect a larger number of offspring. It is also not rare for homosexual flamenco couplings to hatch eggs and nurture chicks of abandoned nests. An evolutionary advantage?

Instead of presuming that any sexual orientation is inferior to another, we offer the view that sexuality as a spectrum of naturally occurring orientations that work together in harmony. Whether or not we fully understand its true purpose, making a false or derogatory assumption is by far the inferior, mis-informed point of view.

It Is A Religious Battle

2008-11-27T10:28:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
It is a battle between people of faith and the gays.

TRUTH:

There is a common misconception that to be gay means anti-religion or vice versa. Sexual orientation and religion are mutually exclusive. There are many gay individuals who are spiritual or religious. There are heterosexuals who aren't. Some people of faith are against homosexuality. The same applies to atheists. Some priests have come out as homosexual.

Why is this picture so mixed? Simple: homosexuality exists naturally among all people, regardless of race, religion or sex.

Then why do we have battles between religion and the gay community? These battles only occur when religious individuals and organisations who have a deep belief that homosexuality is wrong feel they need to be pro-active against gay people and their rights. The events that ensue from such action disturb, what would otherwise be, a peaceful co-existence.

Suggested reading:
Bishops Bid Overturn Ban On Gay Marriage

Something extra to think about:

Homosexuality Is Simply Unnatural

2008-11-25T13:49:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
Homosexuality is simply unnatural.
People have "in holes" and "out holes" in their body.

TRUTH:

When people talk about whether homosexuality is unnatural or not is general focus on anal sex. Apart from totally excluding female homosexuality from the equation, it also ignores heterosexual couples who engage in this form of sexual activity. We would be tempted to conclude that a certain aspect of heterosexuality is also unnatural. But we won't.

Anal sex isn't a pre-requisite to male homosexuality. Homosexuality is a sexual orientation, not a condition that promotes any particular sexual act. Assuming that being gay requires a particular act, or any sexual experience indicates ignorance toward this topic.

Natural sexuality isn't ever simple. Not in nature. Not in humans. It provides us with a spectrum of healthy, valid sexual orientations that we do not choose, but hope to express in the fullest, healthiest way possible.

Gays Can Marry... The Opposite Sex!

2008-11-22T00:01:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
Gays are not being harmed by marriage bans because
they can already marry someone of the opposite sex.
Wanting gay marriage is wanting extra rights.

TRUTH:

We won't spend too much time explaining just how ridiculous and un-informed this kind of statement is. We have already made posts on gay marriage, sexual orientation, minority groups and choice.

For those who don't have the patience to look through our already abundant truth based factoids, we wish to make a rather strong point:

The idea of a gay person entering into a heterosexual relationship is possibly the most harmful and disrespectful thing they can do to themselves and their families.

Again, we invite you to revisit an earlier post of ours.

Myth Mother, Truth Daughter

2008-11-21T04:41:00.000-08:00

We recently came across this article "I Can't Forgive My Daughter For Being Gay" by the Daily Mail. This is a mother's story of realising her daughter is gay, followed by her daughter's response.

We have separated sections of this article into Myth/Truth breakdowns. This is an excellent case study and example where a parent is a victim of the many myths that are commonplace about homosexuality, and her daughter is a victim of homophobia and social pressure.

MYTH Mother:

"...she met Tony, who worked for a construction firm. After a whirlwind romance, they got married when she was 23 and I was thrilled. Both Len and I very much liked Tony - we really felt he was right for her."

TRUTH Daughter:

"With hindsight, the only reason I got married to a man... was because I knew it would make my parents happy... I knew it wouldn't make me happy. ...for some reason she couldn't help herself engineering our relationship into a marriage. ...I feel very upset to find I have 'disappointed' my parents."

MYTH Mother:

"Now, she has come out as gay and I look at her - with her short hair and masculine clothes, - and wonder where did we as parents go wrong? I will always love Sarah, but I can't help feeling that how she has turned out is such a disappointment. It wasn't that I had anything against homosexuals... it wasn't what I wished for my child."

TRUTH Daughter:

"Mum may think she had some influence over my sexuality, but she needn't feel guilty because in fact I've known I was gay since I was very young - I just desperately tried not to be."

GayTruth Adds:

Deep down the mother most likely feels that being gay is inferior, less valid and immoral. This is a product of how society incorrectly views gay people.

MYTH Mother:

"I also feel Sarah would create a better first impression if she grew her hair and dressed in a more feminine way. But she seems to take pleasure in dressing to shock me."

TRUTH Daughter:

" I was just doing what felt comfortable for me. I never deliberately tried to be rebellious. Instead, I kept myself to myself and tried very hard to be straight and had lots of boyfriends."

MYTH Mother:

"...I did find the way she and Sarah talked about having children very odd."

TRUTH Daughter:

"For some reason, Mum seems to think that because I am gay, children are out of the question. She seemed surprised to find that Natalie and I wanted a family."

GayTruth Adds:

Homosexual people exactly the same desires as heterosexuals to have families and children.

MYTH Mother:

"It seems trendy for parents to claim they 'accept'... but the truth is that underneath-people are still prejudiced in different ways."

TRUTH GayTruth:

It is only through truth, discussion, acceptance and understanding that this deep seeded bias will change. Not sweeping it under a rug.

MYTH Mother:

"...makes me feel as if I have 'lost' my own daughter."

TRUTH Daughter:

"It's only recently I have truly accepted myself as gay. Mum and Dad are just going to have to accept it too."

GayTruth Adds:

Her mother has also closed herself to learning more about the daughter she has and becoming closer as a result. Instead she is focused on what she wishes her daughter should be. We feel this is the saddest part about this story.

Full article:

I Can't Forgive My Daughter For Being Gay

Gayness Is A Product Of Our Times

2008-11-20T03:14:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
Many years ago we didn't hear much about homosexuality.
Now everyone is jumping on the bandwagon. It is a product
of our ever changing times.

TRUTH:

Homosexuality was simply something that wasn't as readily discussed. It was no indication of how many gay people existed. Regardless of whether they succumbed to forming families in heterosexual relationships or hid their relationships with their "friend".

Many people in their 60s and 70s are only just coming out today who felt they could not earlier due to the very different social attitudes of that time.

Experimenting With Being Gay

2008-11-19T02:47:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
Some people like to experiment with being gay.

TRUTH:

There is often a confusion between homosexual orientation and what they consider gay behaviour. We know that sexual orientation is something that we can not change. When straight people claim to have experimented with being gay it can only mean two things:

They are not straight, but somewhere in the spectrum in between straight and gay (bisexuality), or
They are straight, but experimented out of curiosity. In our eyes, this says nothing about their true sexual orientation.

Now before we leave the above open to a distortion, we wish to say this: What of gay people who "experiment" with being straight? The same applies. Regardless of what social pressure people are faced with to change their behaviour or actions, it doesn't necessarily comply with their innermost sexual desires.

Gays Marry For Love?

2008-11-18T02:50:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
"...prop 8 was not about [love]... it was about
whether the state would recognize it."
- jhamm999 (YouTube response when Wanda Sykes asks:
"how can you stop people from loving each other?")

TRUTH:

We have already stated that gay civil rights is not about love. Many straight people are married for other reasons. It doesn't stop them for exercising their fundamental right though.

Knowing this we ask: do you think a gay couple would marry for any reason other than love? Would a gay couple marry for:

convenience?
religious duty?
family tradition?
to prevent an otherwise illegitimate child from being born?

No!

There is no other reason why a gay couple would marry besides love. This is why many declare this four letter word with such conviction when they speak of their legal rights.

Furthermore (yes, we will say this again), giving homosexuals something that isn't called marriage sends out the message that being gay is wrong and that gay relationships are inferior or less important. That is what it comes down to. In essence, it is the "love" campaigns like Prop 8 threatens to keep below the water line.

Original video resource below:

Gays Can't Use The Word Marriage

2008-11-16T13:18:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
Marriage is a religious sacrament. Gays can have civil
partnerships with similar rights. They should not be
allowed to use the word "marriage".

TRUTH:

We are not denying that Marriage is a sacred sacrament to Christians and other faiths. However, if we are to only allow the religious to a word that is universally accepted among all people, shall we take away the rights of atheists or people of other faiths to:

celebrate Easter?
use the word Marriage also?
buy and send people Christmas Cards?
say "Bless You" when someone sneezes?

Or is this thought process more about the misunderstanding of what homosexuality is, rather than trying to protect an institution?

We believe that calling it something else for gay people implies that homosexuality is wrong or at a lesser level than heterosexuality. That gay relationships are somehow of lesser value to our society. As long as this mentality prevails, this myth (and others) will continue to exist.

Gays Destroy The Sanctity Of Marriage

2008-11-16T01:23:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
Gay marriage destroy the sanctity of marriage,
the protection of our children, the fabric of society.

TRUTH:

We have discussed a number of articles on this topic. Gay marriage does not affect heterosexual marriages or society in any negative way. That fact is, it would help legally and socially validate the many gay long term relationships and families who co-exist in our world today.

Gay marriage helps reinforce the sanctity of marriage, protect the children of gay parents, and strengthen our society.

There have been many initiatives to ban gay marriage on different levels, often under the mythical guise of what harm it may do. These myths are born of the many other misconceptions and fears.

If gay marriage is destroying an institution, then why not focus the actual, real threat of:

marriages of convenience?
fly-by-night marriages?
arranged marriages?
divorce?

Some video resources:

African-Americans Took Our Rights Away

2008-11-15T10:51:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
"The minority group of African-Americans decided
to revoke equal rights from another minority."
-the gay community in light of the Californian vote

TRUTH:

It is unfair fair to single out any minority group, including African Americans, Hispanics, or American Asians, who may not be well versed in the homosexual sexual orientation. This only re-enforces the need to increase opportunities for education in schools and community groups.

There are many barriers that prevent the truth from winning out. These include taboo, internal homophobia, religious bias and invisibility. We understand there is a lack of knowledge when some people say proclaim "it is about love" and others reply with "if I love my dog why can't I marry or have sex with it?"

Many countries in Africa have the death penalty or imprisonment for homosexuality. In our story, "South Africa loves me more than the USA", we find South Africa is somewhat unique as a vastly culturally diverse nation that has made huge inroads in human rights. There is no one religion or culture that truly dominates, boasting communities of Black, White, Afrikaans, Christians, Hindus, people of Zulu Land, Muslims and other sub-cultures and beliefs structures. Their traditions may at times negate one another, but in the most part they believe their own and let others be. There is the South African historical cue that recognises their diversity, so it makes sense to give every group the same basic human rights. Even when you don't understand them fully, it doesn't necessarily mean their way of being is incorrect or inferior. Through this liberty, people begin to understand each other on a deeper level. In order to understand others we need to treat them equally in every way. Otherwise we are placing people in boxes with labels. No one learns anything from that experience.

GayTruth Story: "South Africa loves me more than the USA"

2008-11-14T02:32:00.000-08:00

An array of gay couples and individuals from all walks of life have shared with us their truth and given us permission to share these stories with you. In the first of several Gay Truth Stories, we meet Chris, who made the move to South Africa to be with his partner in life, James.

Last week I went into the local medical centre to do a health check. Just one of the things I need to do in order to attain a Partnered VISA here in South Africa. I was nervous because I knew the doctor would notice my American accent, see the papers for immigration and ask "So what brings you here to South Africa? Work?"

You see, James (my boyfriend, practically husband, other half, the guy who keeps me warm at night) found work here. An offer too good to say no to. As a couple, WE decided that he should take the job. We had been together for a while and knew we could do this. I in no way could make a move with him at the time because I had signed on to build my first home.

For the better part of two years, we were living apart on different continents. We spent hundreds of dollars on phone calls a month until we discovered Skype. I made two visits to Africa. He made a couple to the USA. Every night, before he went to bed I'd call having just arrived from work. Considering the 6-7 hour time difference, he'd sometimes stay up later depending on my work commitments. Either way, neither of us could go to sleep if we had not spoken to each other at least once a day.

Earlier this year, having finished my house, and rented it out, I "moved" to South Africa. I sold a lot of things that I didn't want to let go of, but felt I needed to. I threw away and gave people many of my possessions, put some things into a storage container, and a few things that we would miss on a ship container to greet us in Africa. It was a very stressful time for us.

Temporary VISAs last a few months in South Africa. Luckily my work commitments allowed me to travel, but now that is over, we need to take the steps for me to attain a VISA based on his residence here.

I automatically began to feel anxious about this. South Africa RECOGNISES GAY MARRIAGE. So why would I feel this way? Well, I guess I'm just so used to the anti-gay sentiment of back home. The sort of look you get when the lady at the hotel check in realises you really DO just want ONE queen bed, damn it. The virtual punch in the gut that requires no words and affects you on a deeper level.

We have a list of things we need to do to "prove" that we are indeed chained at the hip. The government from where we lived in the USA doesn't recognise gay relationships. We didn't have the one thing that would have made this process a lot simpler. We need testimonials, interviews, photographic evidence, documentation galore, and medical examinations. How would I handle sitting down with all these people and look them in the eye?

Do I lie to the doctor when he asks why I'm here?

I replied, "...because my partner moved here for work" and gulped. Everyone knows what it means when a guy says "partner" right? Its just a quiet way of saying "my b-b-b-oyfriend".

This doctor responded with a thick South African accent, "Great! What does your partner do? How are you two liking it here?" Oh my goodness. He totally said "partner" back didn't he? Through the medical exam, our general conversation confirmed any doubt that he understood that I'm gay, and that I'm immigrating, and that I am excercising my civil right to immigrate based on the fact I am James's other half. Even though I'm not a citizen here, we are treated with more respect. He was very nice. Very welcoming. Very ACCEPTING.

All of a sudden I realised that I under-estimated the South African people and its government. I made the assumption that even though, as a gay couple who have EVERY bit of the same rights as heterosexual couples, we would somehow still face people who didn't like the "lifestyle choice". In reality, everyone who we have been honest with have in fact become closer to us as friends. We have quickly formed a friend network of people who love to invite us for dinners, or the movies on Saturday nights. South Africa, with its many faults and tarnished history, truly accepts all people without judgement or misconception. They would be fools not to have learnt from their HISTORY of discrimination.

This may seem like a small thing, but I needed to pause and reflect on the part that read "I Chris Mullins am in a homosexual/heterosexual relationship with James Harris with the intention of being life partners". I signed on the dotted line. WOW. In that moment it finally FELT like WE existed beyond our little sanctuary. It was an amazing feeling.

I can just imagine how people of California felt when they ACTUALLY got married. Had that piece of paper in their hands as proof of total social acceptance. A word, MARRIAGE, that, attached with it, comes a universal understanding.

I can only imagine how they must have felt when Prop 8 passed. When a movement of misguided people voted it away. The fact that by not recognising the marraige, they're implying that it's wrong. That must really cut deep.

I just feel lucky we're in a country like this and the move wasn't the other way around.

I love South Africa. And it loves me back.

Sincerely,

Chris

Certain facts such as names and specific locations in this story have been changed to protect the author. Its truth, however, remains intact.

Have a story to tell? Email us.

It Is A Gay Right

2008-11-12T23:09:00.000-08:00

MYTH(conception):

TRUTH:

Well, this isn't a myth per se, but we just want to get one thing straight. Many people see a sign like this and begin to make comparisons to prostitute rights, polygamists, murderers, or other felonious groups of people who choose to live or act in a particular way.

Gay rights are human rights. Gay people do not choose to be gay. We know the truth is that homosexuality is a part of the spectrum of normalcy that is the human sexual orientation (not to mention other creatures). Treating them differently under the law, is wrong, misguided and discriminatory.

First Gay Marriage, Then Polygamy

2008-11-12T13:41:00.000-08:00

MYTH:

"If you open it up to a civil rights issue...
...then you have to open it up to polygamists..."
-Bill O'Reilly

TRUTH:

Banning gay marriage is discrimination against someone's sexual orientation. Sexuality isn't something you choose. Homosexuality is just as valid as heterosexuality.

Gay people can not righteously decide to marry a heterosexual person. They do not choose the gender they fall in love with, and taking away a right that heterosexuals enjoy is wrong and immoral.

Polygamists are so through conscious choice. They decide to either marry one person or more than one. A polygamist movement would have nothing to do with the suppression of a group of people who are marginalised based on something they cannot decide or help. Gay marriage does not undermine society, or change its structure. Gay families are exactly the same as their heterosexual counterparts barring one detail that is just as valid as the other.

Gay people need equal rights. Polygamists would require an array of new and more complex legal arrangements to account for multiple partners.

Arguments drawing parallels between gay marriage and polygamy are short sighted and wrong. They ignore some very basic and critical truths about homosexuals.

Gays Have Rights

2008-11-12T03:52:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
"Gays have rights... gays have more rights than straight people."
-Mary Ann (Donated of $500 to Prop 8)

TRUTH:
This is far from the truth in the the law books, and in the real world.
We will discuss this more in a later post. In the meantime, we
have a video to show you that outlines the harsh reality.

Traditional Families Are The Best Way

2008-11-11T01:47:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
Children best develop in mother and father homes.
The traditional, nuclear family is the core of our society.

TRUTH:
The core of society is family, not just nuclear/traditional families.

Children require the security of a stable and structured household; not always existent in a nuclear family. We can not assume that a child in such a structure will automatically have the best chance in life. It is also false to assume that non-traditional family structures are second class. They are the decisions of adults and solid, supportive family structures that help children develop their maximum potential.

Gay Truth will be introducing you to some real examples non-nuclear families that have flourished and worked wonderfully. These stories are often transparent to society and we believe the importance of their visibility.

In the interim, possibly one of the best examples of the shining product of a non-traditional home, is Barack Obama himself.

Further reading: Gays Tear Apart Families

There Are More Important Issues

2008-11-10T06:44:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
There are more important issues to deal with than pushing
gay equality. The economy, the environment, hunger...

TRUTH:

We do not wish to insult anyone's intelligence by acknowledging that there are issues that affect us globally. Even gay people have resigned to this statement in deciding whether to put forward their cause. But, for how long do we place gay equality in the back burner?

Consider these three points:

Of what value is a sound economy to a gay person who's taxes contribute to civil liberties and protections that aren't fully accessible to them?
People are relatively more informed of causes in financial security and the environment. What would happen if most understood the true experience of homosexuals in today's world? Do we turn a blind eye?
Other issues will always be there to challenge us. Why not get gay equality out of the way now?

Gays And AIDS

2008-11-09T15:06:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
Gays are more likely to get AIDS.
It is mostly a gay disease.

TRUTH:
The primary mode of HIV infection worldwide is
through sexual contact between members of the opposite sex

One of the most common misconceptions about AIDS is the direct link between homosexual men and contracting the virus. There is more evidence, however, that the AIDS epidemic between gay men is more a result of homophobia than their sexual orientation.

Firstly, condoms are not required as a contraception between two men. The lack of use of this measure made them more susceptible to sexually transmitted disease, especially when it is unknown. Secondly, and more significantly, is the effect of a lack of social approval of homosexuality, contributing to the difficulty of sustaining long term, stable relationships. Unfortunately, this promoted a culture of men who engaged in sexual acts with a larger number of partners. Combined, these factors increased the receptiveness of gay men contracting HIV.

Through awareness and increasing social approval, studies have shown the trend of gay men contracting HIV has dramatically increased. Conversely, the myth that this is mostly a gay disease among the heterosexual community plays a deadly role in increasing their frequency of exposure to the virus, especially among women.

It Is All About Anal Sex

2008-11-08T14:42:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
Homosexuality is all about sex, especially anal sex.

TRUTH:
Not all homosexual men engage in anal sex and prefer
not to engage in this sexual act.

It is not an activity isolated to gay men. In fact, about 10% of straight couples enjoy the regular stimulation of anal sex. Sometimes it is used as a form of contraception.

Anal sex is a part of the human condition and is not a gay-specific invention. The spectrum of human sexuality also includes oral sex and mutual masturbation; enjoyed by all people regardless of their sexual orientation.

Anal sex is often the first thing some people think about when dealing with homosexual issues, even though half of the gay population, lesbians, may rarely perform the act at all. We've stated this before, but we will say this again with these words:

Homosexuality is the natural, sexual attraction to the same gender, which is a part of the spectrum of the world's normalcy. It is not all about sex, or any sexual act in particular. Physical, emotional, social, and sexual attractions, not behaviors, determine a person's understanding of their sexual orientation.

There Is No Biology To Homosexuality

2008-11-07T11:15:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
No studies have ever concluded homosexuality is biological.
Homosexuality is not natural, correct or moral.

TRUTH:

No study has ever concluded that homosexuality isn't.
However, there are many studies that point toward this being truth,
especially when we begin to understand its natural process and place in nature.

There was a time when we didn't understand a number of biological
processes that we do today. It is not, however, an excuse to make
assumptions of whether something is unnatural, incorrect, or immoral.
Especially these myths are cemented in religious ideology.

Gays Tear Apart Families

2008-11-06T05:09:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
Homosexuality tears apart families.

TRUTH:
Homophobia tears apart families.

There is a somewhat distorted belief that homosexuals who come out directly cause the destruction of family units. This is especially so in families where homosexuality is believed to be a sin and immoral. The constant pressure to change others and the pressure to censor oneself is an unbalanced way of being.

It is not homosexuality itself that tear apart families, but rather the beliefs that bring about the conflict. In most cases, family bond relationships become stronger when a member decides to reveal one of the most intimate part of themselves. They are free to bring their partners home and share their lives in a more complete and healthy way.

In essence, the acceptance of homosexuality within the family brings only helps strengthen their bonds.

"Love" Is Just An Excuse

2008-11-05T14:47:00.000-08:00

MYTH:

I can love my mother. I can love my sister. I can love my cat.
It isn't an excuse to have sex with or marry them.
It isn't an excuse to require the law to approve of it.

TRUTH:

When it comes down to it, it isn't about love at all. Many heterosexuals marry for reasons other than love. Love isn't a prerequisite in the eyes of the law. Neither are religious beliefs.

What it does come down to is equal rights. Homosexuals are naturally attracted to people of the same gender. Consequently, they also have a tendency to fall in love with the same, want stable relationships, and gain social acceptance; just as heterosexuals do with the opposite. These, of course are between consenting, unrelated adults.

Really, it is that simple.

So Close But So Far - Prop 8 And Gay Truth

2008-11-05T03:50:00.000-08:00

Of all propositions put forward, Proposition 8 was one of the closest call of all - 52.1% voting YES and 47.9% voting NO - hardly a sweeping victory for those who succeeded in writing gay discrimination into the Californian constitution. This is a direct result of unjustified fear and false assumptions. No real education was provided.

Our place is to deliver the truth and dispel the many myths on homosexuality that permit such events to occur. We hope you share this invaluable resource with others.

Gay Truth is saddened that this measure (and others across America) have taken place against these people. We are witness, once again, to the many sufferings and injustices to the gay community. Another mark to look shamefully back on in history.

We only hope, through education, that one day, a resounding "NO "will be the overwhelming response, or rather, any proposition of the sort being put forward at all.

Turning Gay

2008-11-04T07:35:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
Gay people turn that way when they come out of the closet.
It is a moment where they change and start to behave differently.

TRUTH:

"Coming out of the closet" is a process in which a gay person makes the decision to reveal their sexual orientation to others. This is required because, on the most part, gay people are assumed to be straight. They have not "turned" into anything or changed themselves in any way, but simply gathered the courage to not hide a part of themselves that was always there.

In this process they may also decide not to censor themselves where they might have otherwise done so. Many perceive this as the "change" where they "impose their sexuality on others". In reality, they are simply expressing themselves in the very same healthy way that heterosexuals do.

Gay Families Aren't As Stable

2008-11-03T08:53:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
Children in gay families are missing the structure and
stability that only a heterosexual can provide.

TRUTH:

It is unlikely that children of homosexual parents would ever be unwanted or unloved. The process and planning required to bring a child into such a family would only promote an emotionally and financially stable environment that not always exists in heterosexual marriages.

He Looks So Gay

2008-11-02T10:28:00.000-08:00

MYTH:
Gay men act feminine and like shopping.
Lesbians have short hair and are masculine.

TRUTH:

It is not possible to determine sexual orientation by looking at how someone behaves or dresses. The stereotype of a high-pitched voice or a limp wrist in gay men is mostly the product of images depicted in movies or depictions in the media. Feminine men and masculine women are simply more noticeable as a deviation from the norm, but that does not mean they are necessarily gay either.

Most gay people are no different to their straight counterparts. The only difference is their sexual orientation.

Gay Men Are Paedophiles

2008-11-01T14:03:00.000-07:00

MYTH:
Gay men are more likely to become
paedophiles and child molesters.

Homosexuals are dangerous as teachers or youth leaders
because they try to get sexually involved with children.

TRUTH:

Members of misunderstood or disliked minority groups are often stereotyped as dangerous to the majority's most vulnerable members, especially if taboo is involved. For example, black men in the United States were often falsely accused of raping white women. Similarly, gay people have often been portrayed as a threat to children.

The number of people who believe the myth that gay people are child molesters has declined substantially. However, in recent years, anti-gay activists have routinely asserted that gay people are child molesters.

Homosexuality is the sexual orientation represented by the sexual attraction of people to the same sex, not the adult psychological disorder characterised by a preference for prepubescent children as sexual partners; which occurs equally across all sexual orientations.

Further reading:
Facts about Homosexuality and Child Molestation

The Gay Barriers

2008-10-31T07:38:00.000-07:00

MYTH:
Gays don't face the same prejudice and barriers
that other marginalised groups have.

TRUTH:

The above statement is actually true; but not within the context of what this myth implies.

In the fight for equality and understanding of truth, homosexuals have a few barriers unique to their cause: Sexual Taboo, Internalised Homophobia, and Invisibility.

Sexual Taboo
Even within the heterosexual world, sexuality is still very much a taboo. Sexual taboos are barriers in non-biased education and tools for constructing misconceptions. Restrictions are often imposed on sexual activities, gender roles and interpersonal relationships. An example of this include difference in gender roles between sexes and how these may change depending on culture identity. These do not necessarily indicate incorrect or immoral sexuality.

Where there is significant taboo, there is significant myth and barriers toward learning and accepting the truth. There is significant myth surrounding homosexuality.

Internalised Homophobia
We have touched on this before. But what does it mean? Where does it come from? And why is this relevant to homosexuals? Put simply, internalised homophobia exists in individuals who subconsciously believe in the negative views of homosexuality. They are especially dominant when these are re-enforced by parental figures.

Of course this still exists within other marginalised groups such as the involuntary internalisation by women of the sexist messages that are present in their societies.

Internal homophobia sometimes results in homosexuals being reluctant to accept themselves, or even resisting participation in the gay liberation movement.

Invisibility
Relating to racial equality versus gay equality, the fact that most homosexuals are often transparent within society (yes, the idea that most homosexuals behave in a particular way is a myth), is a barrier toward reaching equality. You may be working or living with a homosexual and not even be aware of his/her sexuality because their lifestyle or behaviour is no different to the "norm".

This invisibility leads to misunderstanding. Even by the people closest to you.

Asian parents don't need to ask their child:

Are you sure you're Asian?
Have you tried being Caucasian?
We want to take you to an ex-Asian program
Your are not Asian. You only think you are!

Within liberation movements, women did not need to prove or educate their opponents of the existence of the genitals they were born with.

Homosexuality Is A Problem

2008-10-30T13:09:00.000-07:00

MYTH:
"Homosexuality is a problem.
Some people have problems with drugs..."
-husbandman2 (Youtube user)

TRUTH:

Sometimes there is a misconception that homosexuals have a problem; similar to people who have problems with obesity, drugs, alcohol and depression. This thinking pattern is a result of assumptions made about gay people, such as believing that it is a choice. Homosexuality is not a life choice, or something that can be changed.

Personal problems are situations regarded as harmful to an individual's life.

Most homosexuals, like heterosexuals, live happy, healthy and productive lives. Their sexual orientation should have nothing to do with their mental, spiritual or physical well-being.

Unfortunately, a lot of the problems associated with homosexuals, such a depression and suicide, are the result of social stigma and myths such as the one stated above.

You Need To Have Sex To Know

2008-10-30T00:21:00.000-07:00

MYTH:
If gays haven't tried it, they don't really know if they are gay or not.

TRUTH:
You don't have to have sex to know if you're heterosexual, homosexual or bisexual. Some people never have sex in their entire life, but they know their sexual orientation.

Conversely, homosexuals who have only had sexual relations with the opposite gender (most likely through religious or social expectation) are still aware of their natural attraction.

Equality Will Just Happen

2008-10-29T06:57:00.000-07:00

MYTH:

We don't need to be so pro-active.
We already have enough rights.
Gays will eventually be equal. One day.

TRUTH:

It is a fact that, through the decades, homosexuality has generally become more widely accepted. There are more laws protecting them from discrimination. There are more families and communities who understand the truth. There are more networks that provide sanctity and support. Homosexuals have never lived in a time where they have felt more empowered.

One of the saddest truths of today, however, is a newer generation forgetting the suffering that their pioneers had endured to pave their path. Some homosexuals have even voiced their contentment with the rights they do have. It is good enough.

Is achieving some liberation truly liberating for a community?

Did the Pan-African movement settle with partial equality?
Did Asian American immigrants settle with just a half the land right amendments?
Did the Women Equality movement sit for tea after just winning rights in just a some accepting states? ( Even if a section of the female community would have rather done just that.)
Should homosexuals be happy with just partial rights and acceptance?

No! What they have now is simply not good enough.

We mustn't forget those individuals who don't have supportive networks or communities. We must not ignore teenagers and young adults who are subjected to ex-gay programs. We must support the fight for those who DO want the right to call their partnership a "marriage". Homosexuals should not settle for equal, but different.

This is why we support Write To Marry Day, in opposing California's Proposition 8.

In our first endorsement...

If you live in California, or wish to find out how you may support "No On Prop 8", please click on the banner below.

Gay People Are More Depressed

2008-10-29T02:21:00.000-07:00

MYTH:
Many gay people are depressed.
This is evidence that they're in an unnatural state.

TRUTH:

Depression, within any community, often have social causes that lead to mental distress.

In general, studies have shown that homosexuals (especially young males) are more likely to become depressed. This is due to the life long stresses caused by the discrimination and rejection of homosexuals, rather than directly related to their sexual orientation.

Depression within the homosexual community may be the result of:

social anxiety
religious conflict
family pressure and expectation
social pressure to be heterosexual
lack of visible positive role models
homophobia (both experienced and internalized)

Ironically, the misconception that depression is evidence in the wrong of homosexuality only compounds the negative messaging that triggers it.

Case Study: "Gays and Depression"

Gays Do Not Exist Here

2008-10-29T00:10:00.000-07:00

MYTH:

"In Iran we don't have homosexuals like in your country.
...we do not have this phenomenon."

-Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad

TRUTH:
The fear imposed by countries like Iran on homosexuals
prevent them from expressing their voice. On average, the
percentage of gay people world wide are equal, regardless
of their country of origin, culture or government policy.

Prop 8 is Democratic

2008-10-28T01:48:00.000-07:00

MYTH:
Proposition 8 in California is a democratic
way to uphold the religious sanctity of marriage.

TRUTH:
"It is wrong for one faith group to attempt
to write their religious values into civil law
that applies to everyone. It is against the
ideals of our democracy"
- Actor George Takei

Gay Relationships Don't Work

2008-10-27T04:06:00.000-07:00

MYTH:
Gay relationships don't last as long as straight relationships.
They just don't work.

TRUTH:

Statistically, it CAN be said, on average, that gay relationships don't last as long; especially between two men.

Although it is easy to conclude that this is a direct result of their sexual orientation, we require a deeper insight in order to reveal the truth.

Can we conclude, in a similar manner, that couples between different cultures won't work? Or that partners where parents don't approve of the relationship might just as well not happen? Can we then blindly say that inter-race coupling or ones that aren't supported by parent figures aren't as valid? Or do we need to look at the way society marginalises and what effect that has on these couples?

Gay people struggle to nurture their relationships in a society that still offers none of the same support heterosexual couples value. There are internal and external problems faced by two men or two women as they create a life together, that heterosexual couples might just never experience. Some of these may even be subconscious.

A few examples:

inability to marry under the law
issues preventing couples from adopting
conflicting feelings based on religious beliefs
parents unacceptability of child's homosexuality
society's views/beliefs of homosexual relationships
lack of visible examples of long lasting gay relationships
subconscious self-sabotaging of relationships based on years of negative internalising

The truth is, committed relationships are more dependent on society approval than we think. The little "pats on the back" that help re-enforce its validity. The "congratulations" from strangers, the imagery we see everyday on TV, the grandparents celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary, Ken and Barbie dolls...

The truth is, there are many, many gay relationships out there that have survived longer than most heterosexual marriages. These are sadly hidden from both the homosexual and gay community. After just a little digging, our promo video shows just a fraction of the hundreds of gay couples and families who "work". Wonderfully.

There is a lot to cover on this topic. Thankfully it has been addressed in detail by Betty Berzon, in her book "Permanent Partners : Building Gay and Lesbian Relationships That Last". With this, comes our first reading recommendation.

A Nice Summary

2008-10-26T03:40:00.000-07:00

We like how this video addresses a few MYTHS:

Being gay is a choice
Bad parenting causes gayness
Ex-gay ministries are the answer

Some of the TRUTH that we think could be clarified:

"You can't choose who you love"
We think it would have been more correct to say
"You can't choose the gender you're sexually attracted to"
They brushed on the topic of bisexuality which is just as valid
and natural as the homosexual orientation.

We're growing

2008-10-25T12:20:00.000-07:00

Our blog has sparked some interest within the community, and we are proud to announce plans to revamp this website.

We begin with a new promo video and banners. Spread the truth!

It is a Lifestyle

2008-10-24T07:47:00.000-07:00

MYTH:
Being gay is a "lifestyle"

TRUTH:

The term "lifestyle" is an unfortunate use of a word that does not apply to sexual orientation.

Let us recap on what the word means:

lifestyle |ˈlʌɪfstʌɪl|
noun
the way in which a person or group lives

Now that we have that established, let us check how most gay people live:

Most have jobs in a professional occupation
They are paying off a mortgage(s) or paying rent
They try to eat healthy, but don't always get it right
Some go to church, some don't
They are family oriented
Have a desire to have nurture children
They go to the movies and birthday parties
They spend Christmas with family and loved ones
They have mostly straight friends, considering most people on this planet are
Many, but not all are lucky enough to have someone to love and love them back in
committed monogamous sexual relationships.

Now, let us check upon our friends, the straight's lifestyle:

Most have jobs in a professional occupation
They are paying off a mortgage(s) or paying rent
They try to eat healthy, but don't always get it right
Some go to church, some don't
They are family oriented
Have a desire to have nurture children
They go to the movies and birthday parties
They spend Christmas with family and loved ones
They have mostly straight friends, considering most people on this planet are
Many, but not all are lucky enough to have someone to love and love them back in
committed monogamous sexual relationships.

Can you spot the difference?

We Must Protect Our Kids

2008-10-23T06:38:00.000-07:00

MYTH:
"...legalizing same sex marriage makes it okay to teach my kids
in school that it's okay. That's taking my rights away as a parent."
-OffMyTail (Youtube member)

TRUTH:
Banning same sex marriage devalues gay families.
It takes away their rights as parents to allow their
children to feel valid within the community.
It IS okay to be gay.